Saturday, December 24, 2011

Christmas with the Family Again: Couldn't be as Awkward as Last Year... Right?

It's almost Christmas.

What the fuck, did you guys know about this?


I'm up around Ann Arbor visiting my sister again for this most tree related of holidays.  Sorry Arbor Day, try sucking less, or advertising more... like, maybe get a mascot?  All I'm saying is that no one sings about their trees on Arbor Day, and you're supposed to be all about trees.  Don't you feel like maybe you should step it up a notch?

Anyway, the lovely and talented Miss Kagashi asked me to look her up next time I was in the Ann Arbor area, but she's not answering.  I guess spending time with family on Christmas Eve is more important than dropping everything to meet up with a moderately familiar acquaintance at the drop of a hat.  Pfft, whatever.

Sadly, my beloved sister had to work today, so in an effort to lighted some of the load, my father and I went out for some last minute beer groceries lots of beer.  That's when we ran across this:

Me: Huh, it looks like they make a beer of the Edmund Fitzgerald now.
Dad: Huh, I wonder how it goes down.

And that pun was too good not to be rewarded with beer.

Later, after my sister still hadn't gotten home from work, I attempted to further bond with my father, with whom I've only relatively recently become acquainted.  Evelyn Kriete seems to be under the impression that he is a super-villain, but that's just because of his reputation for living alone in a house deep in the woods, surrounded by security cameras, and that he fixes robots for a living.  Anyway, during our conversation we briefly discussed his hobby of purchasing things in internet auctions and turning them around to sell again.  Such as this blue school bus he recently picked up. 

Seriously, I don't even know where to begin.

So yeah, that's what I'm up to.  I hope everyone else out there is having a beautiful and surreal time with their families, too.  If you happen to have a moment, tell me about what you're doing.  I love hearing from you guys.
Oh, and Merry Christmas.*

*No, I don't care about your beliefs.  Christmas is happening with or without you, and I want you to have a good day, so suck it.**  Merry Christmas!!!

**You're dicks for making me explain that.  Why can't you just be happy?  There was a nice lady at the Best Buy today who's birthday is on Christmas.  If I said to you "Happy That Nice Lady at Best Buy's birthday," would you get so offended?  I would hope not.  Anyway, Happy That Nice Lady at Best Buy's birthday, everybody!  I love you!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

A Minor Disagreement

Someone keeps trying to convince me that there is some sort of phallic implication involved in Roger Wood's Lumberjack Sausage.

Personally, I don't see it.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

SWTOR is Here: I'll Miss You All

The story starts with a video gamecompany called Bioware. In 1998, they came out with a D&D videogame called Baldur’s Gate. I ruined my first car trying to help mydear friend Brandon Mason trying to get that game. That journey ledto what is now known as my Werewolf Story, I should tell it to yousometime.

In 2002, Bioware released another D&Dgame, Neverwinter Nights. I spent WAY too much of my life playingthat game. The story and the gameplay were amazing. There was afeature that allowed the player to use the game engine to constructtheir own worlds and story lines, allowing completely freshplayer-generated content, online. It was a breakthrough.

2003 was where things changed. Biowarereleased another RPG named Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic. KotOR was one of the most influential games of our time. It wasnumerous awards and changed how much of the Star Wars communityviewed their beloved IP. The game centered on the little-known eraof Star Wars mythology known as The Old Republic. It took placearound 3,000 years before the rise of Darth Vader. In those timesthere were still thousands of Jedi and thousands of Sith. There wereforms of the Republic and Empire, but they were different. It was afresh look that still felt every ounce the Star Wars we grew up with. The setting was intriguing, but it was the story that blew us allaway. That was when Bioware cemented itself as a powerhousestory-teller in the minds of gamers everywhere.

They released Mass Effect in 2007 andshowed us all that they were able to produce epic story and gamequality consistently, and this time with an independently created IP.

Now that you have a glimpse at thebackstory, let me tell you about 2008. That year Bioware announcedthat it was beginning construction of its very first MMO. We wereall thrilled. If Bioware could produce an MMO with the same qualityas its single-player RPGs, then it could be something really special. Not long afterward, there were rumors that Bioware had been workingclosely with Lucas Arts, purchasing various development rights. Manypeople began to wonder if these two were related. Could Bioware beplanning a Star Wars MMO?

Before we go any further, let memention that there was already a Star Wars MMO at this time. It wascrap. Complete. Crap. We, as a gaming community, were ashamed ofit. It was called Galaxies. It was set in the movie era and itwould take an entirely separate long post to explain why it was sobad, but take my word for it. The question was, how could Bioware’sStar Wars MMO stand tall and majestic while knee deep in the rancormanure that was galaxies?

On October 21st 2008, we gotour answer. Bioware officially announced that it was developing aStar Wars MMO set in the time period of The Old Republic. It was asif millions of voices suddenly cried out in joy, and they haven’tyet silenced.

For over three years now, I have beenfanatically following every aspect of the development of this gameand have been impressed at every turn. My friends and I havediscussed every aspect of this game at great, great length. Theinterest that others put into following sports, politics, orprostitution, we put into this. Theorizing and fantasizing about itbecame a major aspect of our lives. With every addition detail welearned it seemed more like they were making an MMO just for us.

The Game officially releases onDecember 20th, but those that pre-ordered can get in earlybased on how early they pre-ordered. I pre-ordered the very morningthat pre-orders were available. Pre-order.  I got in yesterday. At7:15am on December 13th 2011, I logged into Star Wars: TheOld Republic. With the exception of a lunch break, I played straightthrough until midnight. The experience has continued to exceed everyexpectation in every way. Except the fat-dude thing, that’s prettydumb.

I guess what I’m saying is this:

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Come Sweet Slumber, Enshroud Me in Thy Purple Cloak

Things That I'll Be Talking About Soon:

Misadventures in Engrish Comp: How to Distrust Foreigners
Apple Bucking Season: How I Became an Apple Thief
The Rapture: Why it's Good to be Black and Rich and a Bad Person
Happy Anniversary: One Full Year of Meet Adam Jones
SWTOR is Here: I'll Miss You All
Christmas with the Family Again: Couldn't be as Awkward as Last Year... Right?
Chino Bandito vs. Hankook Taqueria: Everybody Wins
Where the Socks Go: Who are these People?
Sudden Epiphany: I Must Croon

For now, though, some thing else:

I am so.  Fucking.  Tired.

I went to go look for a picture to illustrate how tired I was, and I ended up with this frog:

what is this I don't even

That doesn't even relate to the topic at hand, yet I am too tired to do anything about it.  That's what you get.  I have been doing full-time work, almost full-time school, and trying to have friends for months, and I am now fully insane from lack of sleep.  How insane?


That is a couch that is also a pig.  I believe that this fully illustrates my state of mind.  However, my last final was today and I'm going to be able to take a little bit of time to catch up on my sleep.  Which is what I should be doing now.  It's just that I promised a stranger at a party that I'd post tonight and I hate being a liar.
So for now, sweet dreams!

Oh, and what have you all been up to?