Sunday, March 4, 2012

To My Greatest Fan

Okay, most of the traffic to my site comes from Ukrainian phishing sites, but a few of you are actual human beings.  When the time came to celebrate one whole year of, I planned to take my most loyal of human readers and send them a gift in appreciation.  Then the time came and I found myself too wrapped up in other things and I let it pass, but I never forgot it.

Then finally, a couple of weeks ago I got it done.  Without a doubt, the most influential human fan of this blog is a beautiful woman named Melissa.  I know that she's beautiful because I've Facebook stalked her.  She lives in New Zealand, which I suspect is another reason that I procrastinated so long... the shipping was notable.  However, since I was going to do it, I was going to make it worthwhile.

Fist of all, I sent her this wonderful Adam Jones t-shirt.

I included with it this exquisite trophy which exemplified her achievement.

When asked what she would like from America that she could not easily get in NZ, she replied, "maybe an owl?"  So I sent her Professor Featherbottom.

I drew her a picture of a llama dressed as Coolio, framed it, and sent that, too (frame not pictured).

And I even sent her a personalized, hand-written letter (personalized, hand-written letter not pictured).

Now, I'm not often on the Facebooks, but I was on today and it told me that today was Melissa's birthday, so I thought I would take a moment to wish her a happy birthday.

Happy birthday!

P.S. - I don't even care if this is way too stalkery.  It's what you get for acknowledging me.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Professor Featherbottom is fitting in well, that really was the best package, even the giant bubble wrap and hardcore American custom stamps all over it, I even keeped the box. Thanks to the framed llama, i often have the first few seconds of ''gangsters paradise"" running through my brain, which can feel ominous early in the a good way, like living on the edge. Also, because I live in the future from you, it was my birthday yesterday, but thank you!
--greatest fan.

Post a Comment