I was once speaking with my dear friend Kendra. We we talking about the best pets we ever had. She told me about a wonderful, amazing dog she once had named Pork Sandwich. I asked "You named your dog Pork Sandwich?" She replied "Hell no. He named himself Pork Sandwich."
Apparently her mother had named him Toby, but one day Kendra was in the kitchen and shouted, asking if someone wanted a pork sandwich. Toby ran into the kitchen. She thought that perhaps he just wanted some pork, but he wouldn't eat any. Wondering we he came to the kitchen, she went to another room and once again shouted pork sandwich. He trotted up attentively. From that day on he only responded to the name Pork Sandwich.
This frustrated her mother, as Pork Sandwich was a silly name for a dog, and she had already named him. She tried to retrain the dog to respond to his given name, Toby. He refused.
All I could imagine was her mother cracking the whip, shouting "Your name is Toby! It's a good name. What's your name?"
Pork Sandwich, as played by a pained, exhausted LeVar Burton, doggedly replying "Pork. Pork Sandwich."
Huh. That was a lot funnier in the moment.