Hugs that go on just a little too long.
Handshakes that go on just a little too long. With no shaking. And direct eye contact.
Sex jokes in the nunnery.
Nun jokes in the sexery.
Purposefully using words in a slightly oblique fashion.
Dead baby jokes.
Live baby jokes… why aren’t there any?
“A man finds a live baby in a trashcan. He immediately calls Child Services.”
Okay, maybe it needs work.
Fleshlights. (I’m not even going to link it.)
Having to explain that the Childlike Empress isn’t actually a child, and is in fact quite ancient, and the actress was eight years older than me, so it’s not weird at all to have a crush on her.
Also Wednesday Addams. Christina Ricci is my age.
Should I have just said Christina Ricci? Oh well. Too late now.
Pretending a strawberry is a tongue, then making out with it.
Not putting water in condensed soup, then drinking it out of the can.
Just a brief list of some of the finer things in life of which most people deprive themselves. I won’t say guilty pleasures, ‘cause I just don’t feel guilty about my nude Gilmore Girls parties. One day I might even get a guest.
What things do you like that most people think are a little off?